A few months ago, I read an enormous transcript from a debate involving a band of hapless people-pleasing democrats so that I would remember why I hate voting. Today I provided the same service to the Republican Party.
Now, you might assume that I’m a conservative. I sort of am. I have voted in two presidential elections, and have voted once for a democrat and once for a republican. Which means, yes, I have voted for George W Bush once. It’s about the Supreme Court, I wasn’t going to vote at all last time, but that has a more lasting impact. So yes, as an environmentalist type, I did vote for Al Gore the first time around. Nevertheless, Bush is generally a harmless dunderhead, I’m not sure that the president has anything to do with anything.
Anyway, I did align somewhat better with the republican platform. And you can’t read those two transcripts without noticing tha the republicans do a much better job at answering the questions. I hate disingenuous politicians. Which is why I don’t want to vote.
Here were their grades:
1) Hunter: +2. Except I have no idea who he is.
2) Paul: +2. The man is a freaking revolutionary. I hope he runs as an independent. I want to throw my vote away for him as a political statement. Right now, I think there is only one mainstream candidate that I would vote for over Paul.
3) McCain: +1. Blah blah blah. Sorry Drew.
4) Thompson: +1. How stupid is the right for red-necks to bear arms? What a dumb ass issue. Take all those yo-yo’s guns. Thompson, while answering a question from some NRA nut rambled this statement, “that’s the protection people have against…” And that right there was the end of it. Three periods and everything. Protection against what Mr Thompson (I’d use his first name if I knew it)? The British? Black people? Tell it how it is Tommy, what exactly do we need all these guns for?
5) Guiliani: 0. He got the most vote volume, +2, -2. I like the idea of cutting spending for the sake of strengthening the dollar. I don’t like the idea of cutting government jobs. I’ve been telling everyone who will listen since I graduated: the government is high paid welfare for middle aged white people. What are all those useless people going to do if not clogging the arteries of our budget? Getting fat and having heart attacks, that’s what. But you can’t tell me you wouldn’t want RudyGu going to town against the terrorists. When I was growing up in NYC’s media outlet, it seemed like every week he was sending in riot police with tear gas and billy clubs to bust up some Dominican rally. The man is a skull cracker, he don’t take no gruff from nobody. But then he said that “Islam is a peaceful religion.” Bullcrap. It is not a peaceful religion – not when you follow what it says. Demerit.
6) Romney: +1. Blah blah blah. Sorry Utah.
7) Huckabee: +4. He’s clearly the best representative of the Christian ethos. Now, I am adamantly opposed to legislating morality, but I am even more opposed to legislating immorality. Huckabee believes what I do, and I don’t feel bad electing someone who thinks the same things that I do. I think that’s the point after all. At one point he said that Jesus wouldn’t be involved in politics, which is absolutely correct though often forgotten by the right wingers. Wait, which wing are the Republicans? Is it Right/Republican, Left/Liberal? Because that is easy to remember. Anyway, he later nailed the Biblical interpretation question (he is, after all, a minister), but Bible skillz are not necessarily a prerequisite for the oval office. Still, I’d rather someone had them than didn’t.
To handicap, I’d vote for Huckabee on the Republican ticket, Paul if he runs as an independent and someone other than Huckabee is the republican choice, and God knows who if neither of those options is available. I’ll write in Coach Saint maybe.
“Mitt Romney” is such a freaking righteously, kickassedly presidential name that in a parallel world, I’d vote for the guy.
McCain has become the white, moderate Al Sharpton. He needs to exit the scene, and he needs to do it soon. He’s just filler at this point.
I love Giuliani — I mean, who doesn’t? — but he’s a novelty candidate. People like the *idea* of Giuliani being president. My theory is that the Republicans are putting him forth because they know a moderate/quasi-Democrat WILL win this election, and since the next four years are going to be comprised exclusively of fires messily being put out and raw, unfortunate transition — with no immediate light at the end of the tunnel — the real Republicans will have an excellent chance of getting a hardcore conservative into office in 2012 since — combined with a couple of nicely-timed fake terrorist threats — by then the American people will have given up on any kind of progression or world unity/peace.
Did any of the candidates mention that Christianity is not a 100% peaceful religion either?
Interestingly, I agree with almost all of what you say.
Except, of course, your last sentence. If you practice Islam as set out in the Koran, you are necessarily violent. If you practice Christianity as set out in the New Testament, you are necessarily non-violent.
But yes, absolutely, Christianity as a political expedient is every bit as violent as Islam. Though they are definitely more hard-core, what with blowing themselves up and the like.
What translations of the Koran have you read, btw? You should read it straight through like you did with the bible. That’s what we should do, actually, now that the bonanza is over.
I read it in Arabic, all translations are corrupt.
[…] Posted in January 31st, 2008 by E1st in Social Commentaries Thus far this year, I have read 60 pages, single spaced, 10 point font of presidential debate transcripts. Tonight I have watched (and am […]